‘I cannot go through life without being fully expressed.’
A very strong and powerful lesson I have learnt by working on myself this past year.
I was having a conversation with my coach the other day about a situation I was finding difficult and this statement came up.
Let’s face it, speaking our absolute truth can be hard. Whether it involves having an honest conversation with a colleague, partner or even standing on a stage and sharing our stories. We have to go through discomfort in order to get there.
A big reason why people aren’t showing up and sharing their stories is due to fear.
Fear keeps us silent, it puts blocks in our mind and our mouths.
Fear makes us stay and play small, turn away from and avoid things that seem hard and keeps us ‘safe.’ But the thing about this type of safety is it is outdated. We don’t need the type of safety that our primitive brains try to orchestrate for us day today.
Fear will always be a part of my and your lives. But if you can recognise where it is holding you back then you can achieve things you never thought possible.
I’m determined more than ever to fully express myself in all areas of my life so that I am staying true to who I am, what I stand for and what I’m available for. It’s how I am able to show up, share my message and story and help others too.
I want that for you too.
So here are a few things to do in order to start speaking your truth and expressing yourself fully.
Find what’s underneath
If you feel like you aren’t able to speak your truth due to fear right now, shine a light on the cause and find out what is underpinning the fear. Usually, it is uncertainty about the consequence or outcome or not enough information or understanding about a situation. Face your feelings about it and the real reason you are feeling fearful should emerge. Get it out, write it down and make sense of it, rationalise it and ask yourself ‘from 1-10, how much is this fear validated with evidence?’
Move towards rather than away from
The thing about fear is us humans want to move away from it as a natural instinct. But this just creates more discomfort in the long run. When I started moving towards my fears, things started to change. In my outlook, my life. And in the results of my business! At the moment I have some big fearful elephants in the room that I have been ignoring in work and life. This week I made a conscious choice to move towards rather than away from them, face them head-on and eat that bloody frog!
As soon as you face those fears, those things that aren’t being said, those feelings that aren’t being voiced, that story that isn’t being shared, can galvanise into action. Turning towards the thing that you fear most will automatically reveal steps you can take towards the goals on the other side of that fear. With action, you see progress, with progress you see results and BOOM! That thing that felt so scary isn’t after all.