Why You Don’t Need to Be Loud to Be Heard

You’re sitting in the meeting.
You have the insight.
You’ve thought through the risk, the opportunity, the nuance.
But you stay quiet.

You draft the email that challenges the direction, but then save it to drafts “for later.”
You think about speaking up in the leadership roundtable, but your heart’s racing and the words won’t land the way you rehearsed.

If any of this sounds familiar, I want you to know:
You’re not alone and you definitely aren’t lacking.
You’ve been trained to hesitate.

For so many women in leadership, especially those who lean more toward empathy, reflection and thoughtfulness, the biggest blocker may seem to you like competence, when it’s actually conditioning.

You, like me, were taught to be agreeable and likable.
To “read the room” (which you are ace at) wait your turn and be the good girl.
You learnt to defer when louder voices are present, even when your voice is the one with clarity, your idea is brilliant, or your opinion really should be heard. 

I’ve worked with so many talented leaders who aren’t being heard. I find it so relatable, and it is also the drive behind what I do. 

So what do we do about it?

Here are three reframes for you:

1. Adopt a quiet rebellion.
   De-centre others’ opinions and recentre your own clarity. Not every idea has to be perfect before it’s worth sharing. You don’t have to preface, apologise or over explain. Speak it.
2. Stop editing yourself out of your own narrative.
   How many times have you wanted to speak in a meeting and stopped yourself mid-sentence in your head? That moment of hesitation is where your power leaks. Instead of hesitating, pass the ‘I’m ok, you are ok’ mindset shift through your head and say what you want to say. 
3. Flip the invisible beliefs that keep you small.
   Beliefs like “I need to be more confident before I speak” or “It’s better not to rock the boat” can quietly run the show for years. But what if your quiet thought leadership is exactly what that room needs? I know for a fact it is. 

You really don’t need to shout, but you do need to speak. Your voice matters, for your team, your org, or your goals, and for you.

I go deeper into all of this in this in this Youtube vid
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If this hits home and you want some support unlearning what’s been holding you back, drop me an email hello@helenpackham.com. I work with women in leadership through my Authentic Influence programme, to find and trust their voice without needing to become someone they’re not.